Its Liam again with another Sunday blog post! This week I wanted to talk about my most memorable movement, which happened on Wednesday. It just may have been my most memorable excretion ever! Maybe it was the lighting, maybe it was the general state of awe that I found myself in while looking upon such a glorious creation, but I swear, as Jesus as my witness, this puppy was purple.
It could have been just brown but it just had this glow you know? Like I had shat out dragon blood or something! Im not gonna lie, it made me feel like I was one of a kind. It made me feel powerful! I mean not only did it LOOK like I cast some magical spell, but, when I was pushing it out, it FELT magical. It was one of those smooth and easy ones you know? Like, pushing was just a technical part of it. Cause it didn't really feel like I had to push at all! It was as if I sat to make an offering at the alter of my sweet porcelain god and my prayers were heard! it just slid on out!
And get this, it was a total ghost wipe. Everyone knows how rare those are! No wiping!? Very little pushing?! I felt as if god himself had granted me the solace and comfort he had granted his only begotten son. I like to think a mondo epic poop was what gave Jesus the drive to be like "Time to preach some shit and teach everyone christianity!" I mean, what else would have driven him to decide to be Jesus?
Anyways, seriously one of a kind. The kind of poop I will never forget. Hit me up on my Patreon if you want to see a picture.
Lets see, other notable logs I dropped this week, not that any really compare. On Monday I produced a set of about 4 or 5 Lincoln logs. You know, thin boys, all about the same size. I think I may have had a little food poisoning on Tuesday because everything was just liquid. I had to go like 4 times and by the last one I was just seeing off color water in the bowl. Wednesday was obviously the glory that has made my life worth living. Thursday and Friday were pretty standard. Oh and yesterday I ate a bunch of broccoli and blasted a full spread. Seriously, I felt like a shotgun doing a hand stand. It was definitely worth it.
That is it for this weeks update! Make sure to follow me on reddit, since they blocked my instagram. Also make sure to tell a friend about the blog! This is Liam signing off once more. Until next week fam!